10 Things That Terrify ENFPs – According to 304 ENFPS

Do you ever feel alone in your fears or worries? Have you ever felt that your fears isolate you from other people? I’ve wondered for a long time whether fears are in any way related to personality type; or which fears are more prevalent among different types. I decided to research fear months ago, and have been talking to as many people as possible to determine if there are any fears that are more common to specific personality types. I’ve also been researching my MBTI® manuals and books to see if they had any information to give.

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What I Found Out:

There were definitely variations in the major fears of each personality type. I made it my goal to get responses from at least 300 people of each personality type before writing a blog post about their fears. What I discovered is that there were some universal irrational fears (spiders, heights, snakes) but that aside from those, the fears varied drastically according to type. NT types, for example, greatly feared mediocrity and stupidity. SJ types mentioned insecurity and financial ruin. NF types tended to have more existential worries about meaninglessness and the afterlife.

We’re Not All The Same

While this study I’m doing showed differences in the majority of fears that each personality type faced, obviously, there are exceptions to each of these fears. For example, a huge number of ENFPs mentioned being alone as a major fear, but there were several who said this fear didn’t really bother them at all. There are always going to be variations within type, so all this post is going to show us is what the majority mentioned. The top 10 fears in this post are based on the number of votes that I got from ENFPs I spoke with in forums, Facebook groups, and one-on-one in real life.

The Top 10 Things That Terrify ENFPs

  1. Being Alone
    alone-in-hallway

By far, the biggest fear among ENFPs was being alone. However, this doesn’t mean they want to be around people constantly. The fear had more to do with not having meaningful relationships, dying alone, or feeling disconnected from humanity in some way. Having a healthy social group, supportive friends, and meaningful, honest relationships are extremely important to ENFPs.

  1. Death of Loved Ones
    cemetery

This particular fear has been mentioned by nearly all the personality types I’ve surveyed so far; although every type seems to mention different relationships more. Certain types mentioned loss of children more, other types mentioned loss of spouses more; ENFPs mentioned loved ones in general.

  1. Meaninglessness
    broken-promise
    ENFPs are strong believers in serving humanity in some great way in their lifetime. They want every moment to mean something and to have significance. There’s nearly nothing worse to an ENFP than being faced with meaninglessness or feeling that their life hasn’t been put to good purpose.

“I worry that I’m going to miss the things that really matter in life in my pursuit of looking for my next adventure. I worry that once I get to the end of my life I will have missed out on all the small things that give life true significance and purpose.”
– Helena, an ENFP

  1. Not Meeting Potential
    abandoned
    ENFPs are true dreamers, and long to do something significant with their lives. They have no desire to just “get by” or fit in; they want to make a difference and an impact in the world. Not being able to use their life to its greatest potential is a very real fear to many ENFPs.

“My biggest fear is that I will look back on my life when I’m older and see all the opportunities I passed up. I have a hard time making long-term decisions, and I worry that the time I spend deliberating or trying different things will never amount to anything. I’m worried I will never meet my true potential.”
– Dave, an ENFP

  1. Abandonment
    abandonment

To be left behind is a major fear for many ENFPs. They take their relationships very seriously, and hate the idea of being rejected by those they depend on or care about.

  1. Hurting People’s Feelings
    Sad
    ENFPs desire to connect with individuals on a deep and personal level. They pride themselves on being honest and authentic in their relationships, due to their auxiliary Introverted Feeling (Fi). Because of this, they have a hard time faking anything, even if it might make others feel good. Sometimes this can cause them to unintentionally hurt other people’s feelings, and this is a major cause of anxiety for ENFPs, who greatly desire harmony in their relationships and hate the idea of causing anyone pain.
  1. Being Morally Flawed and Not Knowing It
    grip-stress
    ENFPs place very high importance on living in accordance with their values. Because they have Introverted Feeling (Fi), they make value judgments that are very independent and are less based on outside influence. They are less prone to accepting a value or moral belief just because someone says it’s the “right thing to do”. This is one of the admirable things about Fi-users. They have a very strong internal moral compass and often have a lot of integrity because of it. I think because of how important living by these values is to ENFPs, they worry more than many other types about finding out their values are wrong or that they’ve betrayed them in some way. Some ENFPs mentioned that they are afraid that they will come to the end of their life and find out that they made the wrong value judgments or had an incorrect set of moral beliefs and were unaware of it.
  1. Old age
    old-age
    ENFPs have a lot of excitement and enthusiasm for the future, and are extremely ambitious, adventurous people. For this reason, many of them cited old age as a fear because it might take away their ability to explore, dream of the future, or be as autonomous as they’d like to be.
  1. The After Life
    loneliness
    The world of the unknown is both exciting and frightening to some ENFPs. Some worried about going to hell, others worried about the nothingness that might be awaiting after death. The reasons that many ENFPs feared the afterlife varied, but if often had to do with facing hell or facing nothingness.
  1. Missing Out
    lost-2
    ENFPs want to experience all the beauty and adventure that life has to offer, and they hate the idea of growing old and finding out they missed out on something incredible. They want to explore endless ideas, avenues, experiences, and visions. This is one of the reasons ENFPs enjoy traveling so much.

What Do You Think?

Do these fears bother you or are you surprised by these choices? Let me know in the comments! I would love to hear from you.

Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type,  The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!

This post contains affiliate links. I only recommend products I truly believe in.

 

Here are some other posts you might enjoy!

10 Things You Should Never Say to an ENFP

Find the Perfect Book – Based on Your Myers-Briggs® Personality Type

The Biggest Misconceptions About Each Myers-Briggs® Personality Type

How ENFPs Handle Conflict

Explore ten things that cause #ENFPs an immense amount of fear. #ENFP #MBTI #Personality

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75 Comments

  1. Hello, as an ENFP I’ve been thoroughly interested in what scares me. Apart from very common fears such as fear of heights, I think the only real fear I have is unfulfilled potential. Just like everyone else here I feel completely different to “normal” people but I also have a massive, massive ego that contributes to this. Over my childhood my parents and I have taught me how to just conceal my ego and it helps a lot as personally I feel I would be a terrible person if I didn’t. Thankfully, I am gifted, I hate boasting and I am embarrassed to be “showing off” but I have known that I have been gifted from a young age. I consistently score high on SAT tests and have a high IQ level, but all this is joined in by a lack of focus and work ethic. When I was 14 I was performing badly at school partly because the teaching methods weren’t suited to me, (I prefer speed teaching and I am able to take in a lot of information easily), but mainly because I wasn’t bothered to be working towards any of the school work. Teaching myself the art of hard work has been one of the hardest tasks I have taken on, but I feel that I am already starting to feel change. The future is exciting and thankfully like me my dad is a “dreamer” and we can dream of the future together but without hard work I wouldn’t be able to go towards my goals and ultimately achieve them. Hopefully I will be able to go on and do everything that I dream of doing, (I am working towards an internship with NASA hopefully at Harvard and just seeing where I can go from there with the ultimate aim being an astronaut), but I know if I feel that I haven’t lived up to my high standards then I will be depressed. Being a devout Roman Catholic I am not scared of the future and the eventual end, in fact I am almost revelling what will come next and just see it as a new adventure. I have never found death of loved ones sad and have been called strange when do not show remorse or signs of grief, but I know they have moved onto a greater place and as a child I would have used the imagery of being at a train station waiting for your train to take you away to the new world. Life is weird, but being an ENFP with a good quick mind just makes it that much simpler. I want to hear from everyone that reads this and will love to be able to compare and contrast experiences and ideas with you all.

    I have social media so please, do not hesitate to contact me and just chat 🙂
    Snapchat: omcalin102
    Instagram: CEO_of_garlic_bred

    These may have some people feeling hesitant as they are not really normal names for social media accounts, but I wear my sense of humour on my chest and do not feel belittled or embarrassed about what people might say about them. I feel like I could talk for ages on this but I don’t want to bore you so I will wrap it up quickly. Being an ENFP is not easy, society is not adjusted to our needs and life is not usually set out the way we want it or would like. However, we are stronger than this, and I urge you all to move forward with your heads held high. Nothing in this world can stop you. You are all able to hold the torch for humanity and push the boundaries of your own respective areas of expertise, and don’t think that you have no area of expertise as EVERY one of us ENFPs are highly skilled at something and most of us have a high skill set in whatever we do. The time is right to do something positive in this world. The world is currently at a crossroads and the current COVID-19 situation is a gift in disguise for us ENFPs as we can now us this break in normal life to step back, self evaluate, and then take a stand and implement our ideas into everyday life. Whatever you do, do it as best as you can, and never ever give up or accept normal life. We must fight for the change, and eventually show the world the overall combined potentials of the strongest personality type in existence, the ENFP.

    Much love everyone, and remember to contact me,
    Oisin

  2. Hi, bro. This inspired me. I feel beloved, treasured and participated. I know you feel the same way

  3. This was really good! It was super interesting for me to read the descriptions behind all of these fears as they make sense to me; yet at the same time some are not big fears for me at all though I see why they would be for other ENFPs.

    For example, I don’t have a big fear of abandonment because I surround myself with a lot of people (well you know, when there’s not a global pandemic). Or Being Alone — that one isn’t the number one fear for me though I resonate with how terrible a hypothetical situation that would be if I really truly were alone, but I hardly ever let myself feel alone.

    Being Morally Corrupt and Not Knowing it is a WAYYY higher fear for me; probably top on the list with not meeting potential as a close second and hurting peoples’ feelings in third.

    1. I think this is why there aren’t many ENFPs in dystopian horror novels or if there are they get killed. Like imagine how many ENFPs died in the Divergent world.

  4. I’m an ENFP 🙂

    I found I relate to the top half of fears most, but the later ones not so much. I don’t so much fear an afterlife, because I’m a scientific type, but I do fear coming to the end of my life and not liking what I’ve reflected on.

    I fear rejection, loneliness, and failure most.
    And spiders. 😑

  5. As an ENFP this feels very accurate although the fear of being alone it’s not much of a problem because I’m usually aware when it may be heading towards that direction and reach out to those I feel safe around and have full conversations with them building a friendship with them. I agree with death of a loved one to a certain degree but also have some kind of hope they will be in a better place and my fear more of not ending things well with them or mending my possibly broken relationship with them before they’re gone. I also have a fear of not reaching my full potential and wasting my life over thinking a lot of possibilities without getting to have chosen my true path in life. I think the number one for me is the fear or losing myself. Thanks you author, I feel a lot more self aware now after reading your article 🙂

    Sincerely, Anie

  6. I’m an ENFP

    My fear I’d being meaningless, having no meaningful family relationships and friendships, old age cuz my life seems to get more boring as I grow older, being alone, when I realize a mistake I did and it just replays on my head over and over again.

  7. For me, this was spot on. Truly fascinating. I found her explanation’s and research to be wildly accurate in my case. However, they’d be in a different order, if they were in a rating sequence. And, would include, fear of change.
    Also, I sense a bit of a pattern with some of the listed fears. Where my fear of change also coincides. In my opinion, they each share an unknown outcome. Where the future is unpredictable, and cannot be clearly anticipated, leaves me in a panicked state. Grasping for familiarity and semblance of normalcy.
    I found something else quite interesting that resonated with me …… during her research she stated, many other personality types also included the fear of losing a loved one. The difference, all other personality types had a specific loved one in mind. Where as, ENFP’s fear had no specification, and feared the loss of any loved one. Making an oddly precise distinction.
    I really enjoyed the article, informative and has inspired me to learn more on the subject.
    Thank you, best regards…… Dee L.

  8. Hi I’m compelled to comment. As this article has made me aware of what I’m going through at the moment. Due to a loved one passing. And the desire to be on my own currently buying a house in the French countryside. I’m feeling fears of loneliness that I haven’t felt before. So we have a double edged sword that takes one away from the other. Looking forward to exploring it. But loneliness fear is not good. I guess I will get over it.

  9. Hi! I’m Emily and I’m an ENFP and…
    Ah, yes, the afterlife.
    I’m afraid that once I die that’s it. I’m afraid that once I live out my life, I will die and not come back and I will never be able to come back and live a different life.
    That’s why I like to believe that rebirth and reincarnation exists – I’d love to come back and keep living and keep experiencing new things even if I don’t remember my previous lives!
    I think after this life I would like to be reborn as the opposite sex – I wonder what it’s like…?

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