The ENFP – Nit-Pickers
You’ve just got an amazing idea and you can’t wait to share it with the world. Then there’s that individual who just has to pick it apart and pull out all the nitty-gritty lapses in logic. The more they tear your idea apart, the more you want to take them down a notch by pointing out their lack of imagination or their inability to see outside the boundaries of their limited thinking. Surely you’ll work out all those details later! You want them to just go along with the general idea of what you’re exploring, and then you’ll iron out all the little problems later….maybe.
The ENTP – Virtue Signalers
You’re scrolling through social media and you come across a widely-shared video of someone helping a homeless person. Their friend videotaped the entire incident, and the comments are filled with “hope in humanity restored” type comments. You inwardly cringe. Sure, it’s great that he helped someone – but something about it seems exploitative and vainglorious. People who draw attention to their good deeds or stand up for social justice in a “look at me and how evolved I am” way get under your skin. You just can’t feel inspired by them because you see their true self-serving inner motivations.
The INFP – Social Climbers
You think someone’s your friend, and you’ve begun to trust them with stories from your life. And then suddenly they meet a richer, more attractive, or more successful person. Suddenly they never have time for your texts or phone calls. People who are always trying to climb the next rung on the ladder of social royalty know how to spout off a lot of inspirational or charismatic sayings – but it’s all hollow. There will always be someone higher up that they want to impress. When you see this quality in people, even if you’re not someone who’s been taken advantage of by them, you can’t help but feel turned off and skeptical of everything they say.
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The INTP – Compliment-Fishers
You’re scrolling through Facebook and suddenly you see an absolutely stunning photo of a friend of yours. She/he looks better than usual, but the caption for the photo says, “Au Naturale today! Been working out since 5 AM. No excuses. But I know I look terrible – don’t judge me!” In the picture your friend is clearly at their best and has definitely touched up certain imperfections on an app. You’ve got nothing against people who want compliments, but why can’t they just come right out and say it? Manipulating people into saying, “No! You look AMAZING!” seems cringe-worthy to you. People who manipulate and bend the truth for minor things like compliments seem completely untrustworthy to you.
The ENFJ – Traditionalists
You’re at a family reunion and you’re stuck at a table listening to Uncle Bob talk about how terrible Millennials/Generation Z/any other new generation is, and how our country needs to get back to the “good old days.” Sure, there may be aspects of the good old days that were actually good, but this tired, condescending tone is getting exasperating. As an ENFJ you enjoy evolving, growing, and exploring change. This doesn’t mean you see ALL change as a good thing, but you also find yourself at odds with people who throw negative generalizations around about anything new and progressive.
The ENTJ – Risk-Averse People
You’re discussing a groundbreaking new theory or project with a group of friends. You’ve created the perfect strategy to achieve something completely new and original. But then someone pipes up with a “that will never work” line. They tell you to choose something more “practical” or “safe.” Maybe they don’t like your choice of career (“go with something more traditional!”) or they condescendingly remind you of an enormous list of potential roadblocks and disasters that could disrupt your plan. You know they’ve scrapped your entire idea because it departs too much from the tried-and-true way to succeed. But you’re a revolutionary. Playing it safe means you’ll only get mild success. You know you’ve got to take smart and calculated risks to win big in life and evolve as a person.
The INFJ – Overbearing People
You’re having your in-laws/extended family/old friends (you pick) over for a weekend. Initially, you’re excited. But then you realize their idea of fun is re-organizing your kitchen (“there’s no order here!”), critiquing your parenting style, and talking over you when you’re trying to explain your position on something. Whether they are critiquing your diet (“Shouldn’t you be eating fewer carbs?”) or your career choice (“Writers NEVER make money – you should work at a bank or do something more practical!”) they seem to have “advice” for everything you do. Even if they might have some good advice to offer now and then, you’re so turned off by their dictatorial, patronizing tone that you can’t respect it.
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The INTJ – Flatterers
You’re sitting at your desk when a co-worker pops their head in the door to ask you a question. But instead of getting directly to the question, they compliment your shirt (you look down to see that you’re wearing a plain white tee), praise your office décor, and ask a lot of trivial questions. This wouldn’t necessarily be so bad except that you know they do this with everyone. They flatter, compliment, and praise simply so that they can get praise in return. This level of insecurity and people-pleasing is a huge turn-off to you and you have a hard time accepting anything they say with any gravity because you’re so unimpressed by their shallow fawning.
The ESFP – Pedantic People
You have some exciting news and you can’t wait to tell your friends…well, most of them. As you describe the exciting news, one of them chimes in to correct your use of words or explain some minor detail of your story in a more thorough way. This person likes to use complicated, fancy words to show off their intellect and they especially enjoy droning on and on about theoretical tangents that have no relevance to the current situation. While they might have some intellectual wisdom to offer, you’re so annoyed by their smugness that you can’t take them seriously.
The ESTP – Self-Righteous People
You’re having a drink with your friends and making light-hearted banter when suddenly someone chirps in with a “Is this ALL you care about?” kind of statement. Everything grows quiet. This individual wants to talk about social justice and the ethical problems facing the world today. They sulk quietly anytime someone makes even the most minor non-PC statement. They make a concerted effort to point out how “shallow” other people are, and seem to take offense at even the most harmless statements. They may have some interesting insights to offer, but they are so sanctimonious and self-congratulatory that you refuse to give them the time of day.
The ISFP – Tangent-Chasers
You’re at a family gathering and everyone’s discussing current events. You’d really rather be listening to music on the couch, but you know it’s the polite thing to take part in the conversation. The biggest problem revolves around one family member who is dominating the whole conversation with random theories and ideas that never seem to end. One minute he’ll be talking about the stock market, the next minute he’s discussing life on other planets. You’re not sure where all these ideas connect, but you do know it has nothing to do with anything remotely relevant. You tune out of the conversation until there’s a long enough break in the monologue for you to excuse yourself or change the subject to something more practical.
The ISTP – Self-Congratulatory Intellectuals
You’re taking a guided tour of a historical site with your girlfriend/boyfriend. Several times throughout the tour, a self-proclaimed professor interrupts the tour guide to interject his thoughts, opinions, or theories related to the tour. These thoughts seem to trail off in several unrelated ways, and you can’t help but roll your eyes. Tours are boring enough most of the time (you’d rather learn about things on your own) without this smug braggart exploiting more of your time with their useless ramblings.
The ESFJ – “Woo Woo” People
You’re at a party and you’re striking up some good conversation with friends about meaningful life experiences and relationships. Then, of course, there’s that one person who’s always talking about astrological signs, crystal healing, or the hardships of being something unusual like an empath or an indigo child. While there may be merit to some of the ideas she’s mentioning, you’re so overwhelmed by the fact that it all seems completely devoid of any connection to reality. What’s next? Alien abductions? Flat-earth theory? Myers-Briggs® personality types?
The ESTJ – Gullible People
You have a very dear friend who you can’t help but feel protective of. In some ways they seem perfectly capable. They hold down a job and have managed to keep a houseplant alive for much longer than you expected. But you have to shake your head every time they open their mouth. They share news stories from sources that are far from credible, and they really believe it when a wild-eyed preacher announces the end of the world is happening IN TWO WEEKS!! You have to be especially careful with sarcasm around this person because they always think you’re serious.
The ISFJ – Advice-Givers
You’ve had a terrible day and you just need someone to talk to. You ran late for work, got a flat tire, and now you are having severe relationship problems. Rather than providing empathy, your friend critiques the car you’re driving, your morning routine, and offers over-simplified wisdom about how to handle your relationship problems. They seem to lack any nuance in their insight. They seem to take the breadth and scope of your problems and completely ignore the complexity only to offer trite platitudes and suggestions that are not only patronizing but miss the point entirely. When people only listen in an effort to correct and “guide” you, you can only cringe inside and hope their monologue of a lesson is over soon.
The ISTJ – Suck-Ups (and People Who Fall For Them)
You’re in line for a promotion at work and you’ve busted your back to put your best work in for over five years. The other person in the running is trying to win approval by complimenting your boss for everything from their notably terrible hairstyle to their extraordinarily average car. You know what they’re up to, but you also know that their methods are giving them an advantage in the situation. Either way, you’re not going to stoop to their level. You couldn’t live with yourself if you poured out empty praise without meaning it. The lack of integrity is astounding to you – and even worse is the person who takes it seriously. Maybe it’s time to look for another job…
What Are Your Thoughts?
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