10 Things You Should Never Say to an ISFP
Have you ever been having (what you thought) was a great conversation with someone, only to trigger them without knowing why? Today we’re looking at the ISFP personality type and exploring ten phrases that they absolutely detest hearing. Avoid these phrases if you want to keep the conversation going in a positive direction!
10 Things You Should Never Say to an ISFP
#1 – “I Just Can’t Stand (a particular type of person who was born a certain way)”
ISFPs will almost always take issue with this statement, even if it’s not directed at them. ISFP personalities are staunchly against discrimination of any kind. If you ever make a statement condemning a group of people for being a certain skin color, sexual orientation, or having a mental illnesss, then you can expect the conversation to end abruptly and without a friendly goodbye.
#2 – “Can You Do This for Me? I’ll Make It Worth Your While”
ISFPs hate feeling manipulated or coerced. If you want an ISFP to do something, don’t act like you have an alternate agenda or there’s some kind of game involved. It’s better to just say, “Hey! I could use your help with something. Are you free at some point to do this?”
#3 – “You’re Being too Sensitive”
This is a really disrespectful comment to make in ISFPs eyes, and it will most likely result in them shutting down completely. They pride themselves on being able to listen to others and provide them with the care that they need. Insulting their own, or someone else’s, empathic capabilities or treating them like an overly-sensitive crybaby is no way to get them on your side.
#4 – “I Told You So”
When it comes to making life decisions, ISFPs learn best through experience and hate being micromanaged or given preachy advice. If they make a misstep and someone’s ready to stand over them and remind them of their “wise” words, it will only exasperate them Yes, you might have told them so, but maybe they learned something valuable from making the mistake themselves!
#5 – “Just Sayin'”
“Just sayin'” is a meaningless phrase that will make ISFPs grimace. In their eyes, anything worth saying should have some weight behind it and be able to stand up to serious consideration. If you don’t have something meaningful to contribute, then they will feel like you’re just filling up space with empty chatter, especially since this phrase tends to come before or after something insulting.
#6 – “Did You Hear What (Random Person) Did? Said?”
Gossip is something ISFPs avoid whenever possible, so they definitely won’t be impressed if you’re trying to pull them into your “story time”. They are private people who believe everyone’s entitled to their own secrets. If you have some juicy story that involves one of their friends, just take it directly to that friend instead of dragging them into it. If you’re prone to gossiping, chances are an ISFP won’t trust you enough to share any bit of their lives with you.
#7 – “They’re All the Same”
ISFP personalities are extremely open-minded and even possess some degree of appreciation for the way people with different beliefs than themselves think. They will not be interested in having a conversation with someone who is close-minded, no matter how interesting it might be. Making broad generalizations about people will be a major turn off to then.
#8 – “I apologize that you feel that way”
ISFPs will recognize this phrase as a cop-out that doesn’t address the problem. Even though ISFPs are feeling types, they’re fairly straightforward people. If you’ve hurt them in some way, they want you to acknowledge your actions rather than implying they’re oversensitive. If you’ve hurt someone else and the ISFP hears you using this “apology”, they’ll see right through to the fact that you simply don’t want to take responsibility.
#9 – “That’s Not My Problem”
ISFPs tend to be helpful by nature and they don’t like to see others suffer in any way. So if you’re the kind of person who shrugs and ignores others that are struggling, they won’t be interested in pursuing a friendship with you.
#10 – “You’ll Change”
ISFP personalities are fiercely true to themselves and will become impatient with people who try to tell them that they’re going to suddenly change into someone else. Saying things like, “One day you’ll get it” or “You’ll realize when you’re older” is dismissive, condescending, and blatantly disregarding the choices and feelings that they have prioritized in their lives.
What Are Your Thoughts?
Did you enjoy this article? Are there any other statements you absolutely hate to hear? Let us know in the comments!
Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type, The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, The INTJ – Understanding the Strategist, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!
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I read about the things one should not say to an ISFJ. None of it sounded right. I love gossip. When people say things about others, I like to know what is being said even though I might be wary of the info. I like to take everything into account. I also tend to judge the person who is spreading gossip good or bad.
I don’t understand this article at all, I also love gossip!!!
10/10 especially the “You’ll change” one, my mother Constantly says this and it drives me absolutely mad and guess what…20 years later and all the things she said would change haven’t, I still think/feel the same about those things, and its never lead me wrong
While i cant say i love gossip i definitely dont hate listening in on it. I like knowing more than one side but i usually don’t believe much of it if i dont trust the person saying it. Other than that everything is super accurate to me!
I 💯 agree to literally every line of this article thankyou ❤️❤️
Definitely #3 (too sensitive) and #8 (i’m sorry you feel that way)! Both are very high on my list of what not to say. 😅🤷🏽♀️