Dealing with Emotional Overwhelm as an INFP
The current state of our world is troubling to nearly all of us right now. From inequality to natural disasters to corruption, there is a lot of pain and confusion in the hearts of people everywhere. Whether you’re doomscrolling through another political disaster, watching corporate greed spiral out of control, or just trying to survive daily life without losing your mind, it’s a lot. And if you’re an INFP, all that chaos doesn’t just stay “out there” in the world—it seeps into your soul, clutters up your mind, and leaves you feeling drained. Maybe you’re working hard just to make ends meet and coming home exhausted, or maybe you’re just absorbing all the discord from a distance and feeling utterly wiped out. Either way, if you’re emotionally overwhelmed, you’re not alone.
Today, we’re going to talk about how INFPs deal with emotional overload—what it looks like, why it happens, and (most importantly) how to find some relief. My hope is that this article helps you feel seen and gives you some practical ways to take care of yourself.
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Dealing with Emotional Overwhelm as an INFP Personality Type
INFPs are usually warm-hearted and imaginative—they’re the creators, the artists, the poets, the activists and helpers with strong values and a deep sense of purpose. But when the emotional weight of the world gets too heavy? That softness hardens. The optimism dims. Suddenly, everything feels like an exhausting, uphill battle against corruption and despair.
When that happens, INFPs tend to retreat, not just physically, but mentally. They put up walls to protect themselves, not just from the world but from their own emotions. And instead of their usual gentle, understanding nature, they may come across as rigid, critical, or even cold. It’s not because they don’t care anymore—it’s because they’re overwhelmed, and their usual coping strategies aren’t cutting it.
Here are some of the biggest signs an INFP is emotionally burned out:
Signs of Emotional Overwhelm in the INFP:
1 – They Go Quiet (But Not in a Good Way)
INFPs are naturally quiet, but usually, there’s a warmth to it—a kind of gentle, thoughtful presence. When they’re overwhelmed, that warmth disappears. Instead of feeling inviting, they seem distant, detached, even a little vacant. Their mind is spinning, trying to sort out all the emotional chaos, and the outside world just… fades into the background.
2 – They Look Tense and Uncomfortable
INFPs are typically pretty relaxed, but when they’re emotionally maxed out, they carry stress in their body. Jaw clenching. Head in hands. Staring blankly into the void while cracking their knuckles like a villain in a movie. They might not even realize they’re doing it.
3 – Everything Feels Impossible
That visionary, big-picture thinking that usually fuels an INFP’s creativity? Gone. Instead of seeing endless possibilities, they feel boxed in, stuck, and uninspired. The world shrinks. The future looks bleak. Even small problems feel massive.
4 – They Turn on Themselves
Overwhelmed INFPs have an unfortunate habit of becoming their own worst enemy. Every past mistake, every perceived failure—it all gets replayed in their mind on a never-ending loop. They start feeling like nothing they do is good enough, and the self-doubt can be crushing.
5 – They Become Surprisingly Critical of Others
Normally, INFPs are patient and understanding, but when they’re overwhelmed? That patience wears thin. They start noticing every mistake, every flaw, and every inefficiency around them. And for once, they don’t hold back. Their critiques become sharper, their sarcasm a little more biting. It’s not fun for anyone.
6 – They See Corruption Everywhere
When INFPs get emotionally overloaded, they start seeing the world as a giant, rotting dumpster fire. Every person, every institution, every system seems full of deception and selfishness. It’s not that they’re wrong—corruption does exist—but in this state, it feels like it’s everywhere, and they struggle to see anything good at all.
7 – They Stop Caring About Harmony
INFPs usually go out of their way to make sure people feel heard and prioritized. But when they’re emotionally overwhelmed? That priority shifts. Suddenly, their focus is on fixing problems, figuring out their own thoughts, and maybe (just maybe) burning the whole system down. Other people’s feelings? They take a backseat for now.
8 – They Struggle to Think Clearly
Usually, INFPs are full of ideas, connecting dots in ways other people don’t even see. But when they’re overwhelmed, it’s like their creativity is trapped in a fog. Instead of boundless possibilities, they see dead ends. Instead of solutions, they just feel stuck.
9 – They Retreat Into Dark Fantasies
At their lowest, overwhelmed INFPs can have some pretty intense, even destructive daydreams. Maybe they imagine storming out of their job in a blaze of righteous fury. Maybe they picture finally telling that one toxic person exactly what they think. These fantasies are a way of venting frustration without actually blowing up their real-life relationships—but the fact that they’re even having them? That’s a red flag.
10 – They Feel “Stupid”
When INFPs are overwhelmed, their confidence takes a nosedive. Ideas that once felt brilliant now seem ridiculous. They second-guess themselves constantly. Speaking up feels pointless. And the worst part? They know this isn’t their usual self, but they don’t know how to snap out of it.
How to Cope When You’re Emotionally Overwhelmed
So, what do you do when you’re stuck in this state? First and foremost: get some alone time. Being forced into social interactions when you’re already emotionally spent is like pouring salt in a wound. The more drained you are, the more critical and snarky you’ll become—and that’s only going to make you feel worse later.
Instead, carve out space to breathe, reflect, and process your emotions without external noise. Here are some things that might help:
- Find a sensory reset. Some INFPs swear by standing with their legs shoulder-width apart, bending forward, and letting their head hang. (Apparently, it helps relieve tension. Worth a shot.)
- Listen to music that matches your emotions. Sometimes, you have to sit with your feelings before you can move through them.
- Talk to someone who gets you. Not someone who’s going to rationalize your feelings or tell you to “calm down.” Just someone who listens and validates.
- Journal it out. Get your thoughts on paper. Don’t filter yourself.
- Try a breathing exercise. Breathe in for four counts, hold for three, exhale for seven. Repeat.
- Picture a place that brings you peace. Whether it’s a real memory or a fantasy, let yourself sink into it for a moment.
- Sing—loudly. You’d be surprised how much pent-up energy you can release just by belting out your favorite song.
- Sleep. Yes, it’s obvious, but it’s worth repeating. Sleep deprivation makes everything worse.
And finally, remember that you matter. You’re not broken. You’re not failing. You just care deeply, more than many people could ever fathom. And life is hard right now. You’re not alone in feeling frustrated, anxious, or overwhelmed. I’m with you in this. I’ve spent many nights with my thoughts spiraling as I try to sleep, so as much as I’m giving this advice to you, I’m trying to take it myself too.
Take care of yourself, okay?
What Are Your Thoughts?
Do you have any tips for fellow INFPs? Do you have any suggestions or insights to share? Let me know in the comments!
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Oh dear…I seem to have been emotionally overwhelmed for a while. I especially related to #10. I think I really needed to read this article, thank you Susan!
I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed and upset for awhile, I kept being rude to my friend whenever she made mistakes. I felt so bad after, and… well, this article really helped.
I love singing the song “Hallelujah” out loud when no one is home. I feel my deep down feelings and emotions emerge and soar with the words and music. When I was in my early 20s I listened to music quite a bit, esp going through depressive feelings and on the verge of suicide. Journaling helped me tremendously in my teen years when I wrote a lot of stream of consciousness and I still journal off and on now esp at the beginning of the pandemic.
Loved this entire article. I related to every single point and have gone through everything this year… I can’t even get calm enough to organise my thoughts and forget finding solutions… I guess I just have to be patient with myself for a while and keep on singing at the top of my lungs in my car…
This article is excellent and spot on. I felt like you were inside my head: I’m currently experiencing all of them! Each of these points were completely accurate; and it’s so good to know that I’m not alone in experiencing them. Wow, thank you. Also, it reminded me of the line, “My alone time is for your safety.” 😂 Sure wish family and friends understood that’s what I need the most when I’m overwhelmed.
Last night I was feeling overwhelmed and so I just got away with my electric bass and amp. It may not be powerful but, it sure is soothing to the soul. I played a few Blues progressions in different Keyes. I also highly recommend it to any soul searching to find relief in these challenging times.
I find it increasingly comforting to know that I am not alone as an INFP. I have been SO overly sensitive lately to people! A look, body language, a remark, etc. All my emotional sirens are going off inside me!! I do as you describe, fantasizing about some way to get back at someone who hurt my feelings in an insensitive way!! For me I do right now have to take a time out and decompress!! It is helping me tremendously. And YES it is for the safety of others. I walk my dog, write poems, read, and listen to music and sing! I’m not sure when I will be ready to socialize. But it does feel like it’s getting closer!! It still amazes me how much time I need to work through things!! That’s just the way it is!! To all be Safe!!
Very accurate as always! Oh, and thanks for putting your books on amazon, it’s easier (and cheaper) to get the books when you’re from another country. Can’t wait for an enneagram book of yours someday.
I had no idea others felt like me. When I’m overwhelmed I do stay to myself. And like others it takes me so many days to process.
I do love deeply and hurt deeply. My mind is unable to let go when I’m treated poorly. By those I love. Emotions I wish at times they didn’t exist. I don’t come across others like me. However I do have close friends who accept me for who I am.
Thank you for a good article. It is exactly what i’ve been experiencing for a while. Good to know i’m not alone in that.
Very accurate for me. I have been there and try very hard not to go back. When I start to feel like this I try to do anything I can to release it. It truly does not feel good because while you may be telling the truth. The way you’re doing it is not good for anyone and you know this. Which makes it that much worse.
Nailed it! 🤯🥺😳
This feels so true, it’s as if you wrote this with me on your mind. Thank you!
Thank you for helping me to understand this. When I am emotionally overwhelmed I isolate. I have a phone however and I sometimes take to social media or texting. Sometimes I say things that I don’t mean and I feel bad about it later. I have been hurt by many people and a lot of bad feelings come out when I am emotionally overwhelmed. I learned it’s best to turn off my phone or block people who might hurt me. It’s best to walk away from bad relationships. The guilt after raging is too much. It’s too much to continue letting bad people into my life. I can only ignore so much before I have had enough.
Amazing article. I never knew I was an infp until recently. I always wondered why I think so differently than others and struggle so much with how others act. So many times I get overwhelmed.
You nailed the reality of emotional overwhelm, but the horrific gas lighting and betrayal organized powerfully against me credibly promise to continue foreclosing any opportunity to gain ordinary human rights, safety or a path to establish real relationships with authentic people. This despicable stalking and promised total destruction realistically deprive me of hope and ability to separate from the horror. This reality is a life I wouldn’t wish on anyone. These Dark Triad creatures want me institutionalized or dead, because I will always know the evil they’ve done. They must eliminate me or my credibility, and, with their money, connections and corruption, they strike me as unstoppable. In a fascist society, there are no checks whatsoever on those with corrupting power.
OMG this is really me! Thanks to psychology junkie, I’m become more understand about my personalities. And I’m always share my INFP personalities to my beloved one (partner). I’m so grateful and thankfil that I get to know him. He is understanding and love to hear what I’m going to saying or singing! 🤣
So good! I really enjoyed this article! I recently saw Hamilton on Broadway. I was excited, I had studied a bit before hand and I was ready to enjoy. A preteen girl was behind me hitting my chair, or my husbands, and rattling a bag of food and then struggling to tear it open, then another bag for 3 hours! I was on stimulus overload, my expectations of the night were challenged and instead of listening to the complex lyrics, my mind was rehearsing ways to politely confront the mother, alternating with violent fantasies of ending the problem. I took deep breaths, and I made sure it was obvious that I was cupping my hand around my ear to hear. I turned and said, please! a few times. I said, shhhh in a calm tone. Nothing worked. At intermission, I asked the mother if they could please open the bag before the play continues. Her response was, “it’s almonds! Do you have scissors?”
OMG. ! INFP stressed out! Alot of my stress is because I would NEVER in a million years do anything to hurt or annoy another person and because I go out of my way to be pleasant and kind and make people at ease. So it just feels worse, I guess, when people disregard me. Good thing I didn’t have scissors! lol.
Enyess, It was a blessing and curse 13 years ago after a battery of Myers Briggs tests over several weeks, determined that I was INFP!! It was a workplace job counselling program to help some people find best fit work. I knew what worked for me before that but thought maybe I’m not considering the whole picture. The problem was, that I was drawn to these “idealistic” niche type jobs where funding and stability was dangled like carrots and I was usually an army of one working on an imaginative project and not fitting in with everyone else. Oh well. Life of an INFP.
Wow, well that clears up my confusion about my type and confirms I really am an INFP as discovered years ago in a team building exercise at work. Sometimes I’m wracked with doubt.