The Flirting Style of the ENFP Personality Type

If ENFPs bring to mind unicorns and rainbows, you probably don’t know them well enough.

Is this a hot take?

Get an in-depth look at the flirting style of the #ENFP. #MBTI #Personality

We’ll see.

ENFPs are often characterized online by their lively, chatty energy and their will to change the subject five times within one sentence. A talent, to be sure. However, Extroverted Intuition (Ne) does much more than jump around in a conversation. Ne is a function that focuses on ideation, or, the mental process of extrapolating connections and coming up with something new. A new thought that is somewhat removed from, although often encouraged by, a concrete basis. Thus ENFPs can live out the sort of bouncy portrayal they supposedly live out online, but they more often come off like a free-spirited intellectual than a child-like sprite drinking their first slushie.

Cherry slushies.

Had to specify.

Many ENFPs are actually surprised to learn they’re not introverts because of the substantial amount of time they live inside their minds, building upon their connections. The ENFP’s auxiliary process is Introverted Feeling (Fi), which comes into play when they want to learn about others and discover the potentials of human depth therein. You might not know their intent if you’re focusing on how charming they are. Yet ENFPs actually use their charisma for a reason: to figure people out. They aren’t just fun-loving and fancy-free. They’re doing work to assess people.

If an ENFP sees you as a love interest, prepare to be assessed, inspired, and unlocked.

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

The Flirting Style of the ENFP Personality Type

They Will Single You Out

ENFPs have a knack for befriending most everyone in a room. They’re fun, and to make it worse, they know just how interesting they are. It shouldn’t be a surprise then that if an ENFP is spending their time trying to get to know you specifically, especially in a group setting, that should be a big hint.


Dinner is served.

An ENFP friend of mine once described the fascination they had with any potential love interest as an intensive “laser focus” on getting to know them. They asked their love interest abundant questions to figure out who that person “really was at their core.” However, the questioning and assessment doesn’t really stop for an ENFP. They will always be pondering someone they have attached themselves to and what their changeable personhood means.

They Will Wield Their Charisma for You

ENFPs are great with people. There’s no question about it. One can’t help but be entranced by their stories and suggestions. I’ve heard it termed that ENFPs make great salespeople because they can “see into others” and charm them into doing “what they want.”


A little.

Yet in the realm of romance, this skill to maneuver others is quite endearing. If you tell your ENFP you want to run your own business, they’ll use their skills of influence to make that dream come true. With an ENFP in your corner, there’s no such thing as impossible. ENFPs exist knowing everything is possible, and their gift of subverting expectation is graciously bestowed on anyone they are smitten with.

If you haven’t seen Netflix’s The Witcher, you might want to if you’re looking for an intriguing ENFP. The Bard, who follows Geralt the “Witcher” throughout the plot, displays an ENFP’s ability to wield their charisma for another quite clearly. The Bard formulates a creative song that paints Geralt as a hero, which quickly becomes known throughout the land. As others learn of Geralt through the song, they seek his services and are willing to pay him coin to defeat monsters. When the requests keep piling the Bard notes to Geralt, “I made you famous.”

Geralt was merely a friend to the Bard. Can you imagine the lengths an ENFP would go for a love interest?

They Will Encourage You Above All Else

ENFPs aren’t personified cupcakes with sprinkles, but they can sure seem like it when they’re pursuing you. When they find someone who entices them enough to keep coming back for more, they’re all in. Part of that attachment includes a sweet encouragement of anything you’re drawn to. As ENFPs can so clearly see what sparks a light in someone, they will pay the utmost attention to what draws in their love interest. They’ll do what they can to keep that flame going.

Although ESFJs and ISFJs are often known for their gift-giving nature, ENFPs deserve a prize in this area too. With ENFPs being so in-tune with the motivations and underlying desires of others, when they give a gift, it’s meaningful. Their gifts are not given as a means to keep up with social graces, but to encourage someone from a place of depth.

An ENFP friend of mine went so far as to purchase their significant other surprise tickets to the very play that had encouraged her writing career. “She didn’t have to tell me she wanted to see it. She had been down about her writing for a while and I knew the play would encourage her. I knew how much it would mean to her and what would come because of it: more books.”

Hello, Santa.

They’ll Invite You on Their Adventures

ENFPs want to travel the world.


It’s one of the correct clichés on ENFPs that line up with the people I personally know. Not that any one type doesn’t want to travel, but an ENFP’s open-minded nature has no bounds. They want to see what is new and intriguing. They want to build upon their mental connections and possibilities with more exposure to what defines reality.

If an ENFP is interested in you, they will want to take you on these adventures with them. As their minds open to the unknown, they want yours to as well. This is possibly the greatest compliment an ENFP can grant another person because the growth they find in exploration isn’t for the faint of heart. They wouldn’t trust just anyone to hang along for the ride. Yet they chose you to be there.

You’re probably the most important person in their life.


What Are Your Thoughts?

Do you have any insight or experiences to share? Let us know in the comments!

Other Articles You Might Enjoy:

How ENFPs Romantically Pair Up with Every Other Personality Type

What It Means to be an ENFP Personality Type

10 Things That Excite the ENFP Personality Type

Jami Cannon is an MBTI® enthusiast who hopes to shed more light on the SJ experience. She holds a very stereotypical degree in History (MA) and loves to learn all she can about the people around her.
Get an in-depth look at how #ENFPs flirt! #ENFP #MBTI #Personality

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Want to discover more about personality type? Get the inside scoop with Susan Storm on all things typological, along with special subscriber freebies, and discounts on new eBooks and courses! Join our newsletter today!

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit
, ,

Similar Posts


  1. Enfp here…would also say that I am more open with a guy I find myself attracted than I would be if I wasn’t. I find myself opening up and being pretty vulnerable…telling them things I wouldnt normally tell ppl right away…like things on the deeper side of me. I’m not sure I do this because I trust them…i think it’s more as a way of testing someone…how honest can I be and have you still like me? Maybe it’s an Fi thing but I feel more right being honest abt this kinda thing when someone is interested in me.
    The part about singling them out and encouraging them are super true!! ????

    1. Yes, I totally agree. I like to expose myself, my flaws, my embarrassments almost immediately to people I am attracted to. It’s a way for me to allow someone I am interested in to relax around me, to open up so I can make the assessment, secretly of course… Lol And God do I home in like a laser. It happened just a few nights ago. I could get my eyes off of someone joining a business conference recently.. by the end of the meeting I found myself in the parking lot, having jumped out of my car after seeing him to say hello. Lol

  2. This is also just how I act around my close friends as well. There is no differentiation and that can lead to some confusion.

  3. I am surprised by the depth of knowledge around ENFPs on this site and page. Well done!

    I have really been in doubt about whether I am an INFP or ENFP but I’m leaning more and more towards ENFP, also thanks to sources (like this) that are nuancing the ENFP.

  4. Yup! I’m am ENFP and this sounds like me. I currently like a guy and I’m doing all this stuff 😵.

    Also, at this very moment, I have 2 gifts in my house for 2 different people. One of them for the guy, of course, since his birthday is coming up. And yes–I asked him seemingly innocuous to figure out what he might like 🙃

  5. Wow this is so me it’s not even funny. :O I didn’t realise wanting to travel the world is an ENFP thing – it’s a burning desire of mine. People to me are like chocolate cake – exciting and irresistable. I play a social online game and have over 800 friends and can’t stop myself from making more because – people are so INTERESTING (well most of them)! I love finding out what makes them tick, helping and encouraging them, and finding out about their cultures and languages. I’ve befriended so many loners and helped them gain confidence and friends and hope for the future. I can see their potential and I love helping to bring it out in them. It makes me really happy to do so – seeing them happy is reward enough!! As for love interests, yes, when I crush I do get rather enamoured. 😉 They become my priority though I do adore all my close friends and love being with them.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *