The Flirting Style of the INTP Personality Type
Do I have to address the robot in the room?
If you like ‘em logical, skeptical, and willing to call you out on your crap, have I got news for you.
Your dreamboat is probably an INTP.
Stick around an INTP for two minutes and you’ll see just how much they care about consistency. (Logical) rules are not meant to be broken. INTPs quickly learn the framework by which everything applies. Afterwards, even subtle distractions will irritate them. It bothers them to no end if someone goes back on the very terms they set.
Person: I can’t stand people who eat shrimp. It’s so unhealthy. *eats two whole chocolate bars*
INTP: *pulls their hair out*
INTPs can’t help but be aware of the nuances within a structure. Much like math equations, an argument (and at times, the actions that follow its conclusion) must line up in order to be valid. An INTP will target any correlation that does not naturally follow.
For the kindergarteners among us:
ice cream + root beer = root beer floats
Britney Spears + root beer ≠ root beer floats
Britney Spears + root beer = a commercial with a bunch of product placement and fizzing
Don’t leave me.
INTPs utilize their uncanny ability to track abstract patterns and deconstruct logic to their advantage. It helps them learn and articulate what they know. Some of my INTP friends are so intensely aware of the flaws in any given system that they have to break down the original system in order to recreate and advance the system to make it logically follow. INTPs seem to generally improve upon past structures once they notice the pivot points that led a theory astray.
For all their confidence in logistical systems, you wouldn’t guess that these individuals who wield Introverted Thinking to critique have such a soft heart. But many do! They’re like a gusher, encased in a malleable shell, yet sweet and tangy on the inside. Quite satisfying, but I wouldn’t recommend them with juice.
If an INTP is interested in you, you’ll wish they were the fruit snack you could carry around in your lunchbox.
Estimated reading time: 7 minutes
Brainstorm with You
If you know anything about Extroverted Intuition, an INTP’s auxiliary function, you know that it’s addicted to contemplating possibilities and probabilities. The function extrapolates more and more from a given topic until all resources of information are depleted, which is rare.
All you can eat shrimp for $2.99 rare.
INTPs certainly have a knack for brainstorming and will openly enter into conversations with those they care for quite readily. When given the chance, the type tends to red rover their thoughts with their love interest freely. INTPs want this openness in communication.
Certainly a fun way to take the edge off of the nihilism too.
Don’t @ me.
An INTP in pursuit of you will put their full brain power to use. They’ll help you come up with ways to enhance what you see and will ponder with you over anything of interest. What should you write your essay about? What details are you missing in preparation for that argument with your great aunt? Are peas and carrots meant to be eaten together? INTPs are the steadfast thinkers ready for your every contemplative need!
Teach You with Grace
INTPs are masters at dissembling logical frameworks. They’re smart cookies with massive brainpower to boot. When an INTP is interested in someone, they really take the time to make sure their love interest understands concepts. Although this might appear a bit condescending, the way they go about explaining is all in the interest of making sure the other person is comfortable with their own level of understanding. The INTP isn’t (usually) out to prove how much smarter they are than their significant other. They’re out to make sure things make sense to their person of interest.
Those secretly bleeding hearts.
Your stone face can’t hide your care, dears.
INTPs bring to mind the bronze sculpture “The Thinker.” The statue depicts a man sitting on a rock. One of his hands seems to be holding up the weight of his head (or mighty brain), while the man himself is seemingly lost in thought, staring downward. The art piece evokes a sense of eternal contemplation and consideration.
Did I mention the man was naked?
Put some clothes on, dude.
Whether clothed or not, INTPs give a similar sense of always considering different angles through which to view reality. They’re driven to make sense of things, whether they be tangible or in the abstract realm. I’ve even heard “The Inventor” or “The Philosopher” among INTP nicknames. A bit obvious, if you ask me, but it works.
A smitten INTP will find a way into your mind in order to help you see the logic they see. They aren’t ones to hold your uncertainty with information against you unless you’re making blatant statements that prove you have no idea what’s going on.
Do. Not. Do. This.
They might implode.
INTPs can be quite gentle teachers to those they are interested in, moving you through content at your pace. If they find you cute and learn that you have an open mind, hot dang. They’ll adore you.
Share Time with You
INTPs love to share their theories and ideas with a willing audience, but they often aren’t known for their sociability and drive to be around others. They might even be the least likely type to run around starting conversations with people 24/7. However, when an INTP is interested in you they will be proactive in taking the time out of their day to make sure there is a communication flow.
I have an INTP friend who says she prefers when others “hunt her.” She claims she doesn’t want to have to do the work of “catching” someone to date. She wants them to come to her.
The lazy minx.
Yet I’ve also seen her put the work in with her past partners. Calling them, planning dates, surprising them with gifts, and so on. Traits I don’t often see attached to our dear introverted thinkers! In theory, my friend wants Tarzan to swing to her door and do all the work, but she couldn’t will herself not to approach her past love interests. They meant enough to her to make the effort.
When an INTP is captivated by you, they do whatever they can to spend time with you. It doesn’t really matter what you’re doing together as long as you both are content in your conversation. Although, I’m sure touring Elon Musk’s home would be a game-changer.
Challenge Your Mind
If INTPs are one thing, they’re abundantly curious. They want to know how things work and why. They treat people in a similar fashion. When an INTP finds someone of intrigue, they ask an abundance of questions to discover what that person is interested in, where they came from, and so on.
Ever play 20 Questions?
Amongst their pointed questions, INTPs will often ask you to explain your claims. While you explain, they’re probably teasing out your arguments and seeing if you can withstand their scrutiny.
Real talk: INTPs are one of the most likely types to wear an “I hate stupid people” t-shirt.
INTPs care quite a bit about intellectual individuality and will probably test whether you can think for yourself or not. Even though they are generally flexible and easygoing, they aren’t easily impressed by just anyone.
Further, an INTP will quickly determine whether you are aware of your value judgments or not. They appear mostly neutral on this topic, as they are more concerned about why you have taken on certain values rather than the fact that you have them.
You may be surprised to discover the reasoning behind some of your strongest-held beliefs. After an hour of chatting with an INTP, you might discover that you no longer wear socks because of the country-wide French fry strike your mom told you about when you were three…which never happened…and will hopefully never happen because we need those.
Generally, it’s a good sign if an INTP keeps wanting to talk to you. They don’t want to waste their time around people they can’t stand.
- The Most Important Logic Quiz in Your Life
If INTPs are Gushers and Gushers are food, that makes INTPs _____.
What Are Your Thoughts?
Do you have any insights or experiences to share? Let us know in the comments!
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About the Author:
Jami Cannon is an MBTI® enthusiast who hopes to shed more light on the SJ experience. She holds a very stereotypical degree in History (MA) and loves to learn all she can about the people around her.
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